Introduction (: 00:06

Welcome to the Better Than Bitter Divorce Podcast, where we flip the script on divorce and show you how to have a more amicable divorce resolution. I'm your host, Tania Leichliter a divorce coach, a certified life coach, and the mastermind behind the Better Than Bitter five-step game plan course, where I help individuals build a pathway towards a more amicable divorce resolution.

Each week, I'll bring you uplifting stories from people who've successfully experienced amicable separations, proving that divorce doesn't have to be a battleground. Whether you're overwhelmed with grief, struggling with custody and co-parenting, or just dealing with a high-conflict individual, this podcast is here to guide you towards reclaiming your life and being what I know is possible, better than bitter.

Tania Leichliter (: 01:21

let's get started. Day five, it is time to thrive. today we're gonna focus on manifesting your desired outcome in divorce. So I know a lot of the way we've been talking about results, we've been talking about outcomes, but tonight we're gonna gain some clarity on what you want, okay? We're gonna notice some old patterns of behaviors, some mental blocks that are really

preventing you from dreaming big and thinking through the possibilities of what your life could be on the other end of divorce. And then we're going to align your choices with your future. So I like to start all of our nights off with some sort of quote. and manifestation, that's what we're going to talk about tonight. Manifestation is not magic. It's the science of aligning your thoughts.

awareness and actions towards a desired outcome. It begins with raising awareness and understanding what's going to hold you back from gaining that vision of what you want for your future. It's recognizing those patterns. It's identifying those obstacles. And before taking action, you have to first observe what those habits are.

Okay, and then you need to challenge your own beliefs. And we've been doing so much the last four days around those beliefs, around those thoughts, around the stories you're telling yourself. So it's only then that you deliberately can practice an intentional effort to begin your transformation of your vision towards reality. And that comes from Dr. Tara Swart, and she's amazing. She does so much research on manifestation.

And so tonight we are gonna do a lot of what she believes is the power of what is possible. So today's work is gonna help you release those limiting beliefs. And we've been trying to do that all along. What's keeping you stuck in self-doubt? What's keeping you stuck in fear? We're gonna reflect a lot on all the lessons learned from the past few days.

So you can move forward with clarity instead of being weighed down by regret. You're going to reclaim this power by taking ownership of this future, this manifested future, this future, this outcome that you desire. And it's time to stop letting divorce define who you are. It is time to define who you are, but also who you want to become. So today is the first step towards that future. So what we're going to do

today, we're going to gain a deeper understanding of the power of manifestation. We're going to learn how to align our goals, our thoughts, and our actions with our goals. we're going to develop strategies to create a clear vision for your post-divorce future. We're going to take deliberate steps to move toward that life you deserve. And we're going to cultivate a mindset that supports growth and transformation.

Okay, so divorce is an ending. Yes, it is. It's an ending of a chapter, but it's also a powerful new beginning. And what happens next is up to you. Okay? I want you to put that saying somewhere on a mirror, something on your sticky note in your car. What happens next is up to me. Okay?

Today, we're going to focus on manifesting your desired outcome. We're going to get that clarity of what you truly want. And we're going to learn how to take intentional steps to create this future that aligns with the values that we did in our five V's, your dreams, and your aspirations. And I get it. We don't get married to get divorced. So this wasn't in the grand plan. But you know what? Life is full of pivots. And in every pivot, we learn something. We learn something about ourselves.

We learned something that we maybe subconsciously didn't even know that we learned. And so again, it's time to dream big and have those aspirations. And we need tonight to actually make some tangible steps so we can get you there. Okay, so let's raise some awareness. Gaining clarity on what you want. So clarity on your ideal post-divorce life.

We're going to move past this fog of uncertainty. And I get it. There are so many unknowns right now. It is just undeniable how many unknowns you have right now that you are facing because again, the agreement's not drafted. You don't know most likely where you are. But if you have an agreement in place, then there's still uncertainty, right? How are you going to execute it? What is it going to feel like? I work a lot with people who have children and

You know, just the thought of maybe not seeing their children every day. Again, that uncertainty is what's causing that anxiety because they don't know how they're going to feel when they don't see their child every day. But again, getting yourself all foggy with that uncertainty and having the anticipation, it's creating anticipation anxiety, right? So try to stay in the present as you move forward and then not just

knowing that you're not just in this situation. It's more than that. You're not just in this situation. This is not a situation because a situation means that there's no control over it. You do have some control over this. This is a circumstance that's happening and yet you do have the ability to craft the next chapter. it's about visioning and intention setting. We're going to identify your values, your priorities

and then the non-negotiables, because in your legal divorce, there are going to be some things that you're going to prioritize, and prioritization in your legal process is very, very important. So you need to figure out what's important to you and make sure you put that at the top of the list. Because you're not going to get everything, You're just not. But if you know what's very, very important to you, because if you have a vision for what you want your post-divorce life to be, right?

you begin to prioritize what you want in the divorce agreement. So defining what truly matters for your future is going to be important. Some people get super hung up on the family home and they want to keep the house. But then when you think about what the future might look like or what you want your future to look like, having more financial freedom could be something that you have in your

vision statement and your manifestation, the outcome you truly desire. So looking at that family home, is that going to get you what you're looking for post-divorce? Is it going to give you that financial freedom or maybe selling the house is going to give you that financial freedom because maybe that'll give you money back in your pocket? Maybe you can rent something. Again, there are so many different ways to skin a cat. And so again, if you know it's important,

you can begin to look at each of the different elements within your divorce agreement and figure out how that fits into your future. Why it matters. Without this clarity, you might find yourself drifting rather than intentionally building your life, right? I don't know this, I don't know that. Again, you're just kind of drifting without ever putting things down on paper, okay? And I know that's really hard to do because you can't like,

And granted, you're going to have a vision for your future. And do you think that's a hundred percent going to show up just the way you drafted it? Probably not. But again, it's about setting those intentions and then setting those intentions again. if you haven't been able to, so if you get to that point and you're like, I need to pivot again, you pivot again, but being indecisive is not a decision. The only bad decision is no decision at all.

So clarity brings that confidence. It brings that empowerment. It helps you take action and it helps you align with your future self.

take a journal and I want you to write down five things, five things a year from now, what you wanna feel, what you wanna be experiencing, and what you want maybe your relationship to feel like with your soon-to-be ex.

what you want your relationships with your friends to be like, what you want your work to look like. Again, these are just five little bullet points on your ideal life one year from now. Again, if you are just starting the divorce process, you know, your top five things, it could just be based on like not feeling what you're feeling today, and list out what those five things are. You know, divorce, some divorces can take some time.

So depending on your assets and depending on your children and how old they are and your working situation, some things do take time. So one year from now could go by really quickly, but you know you don't want to feel the same way you're feeling today. You know that you don't want to be acting or doing what you're doing today. So write down those five things that you want for your ideal life.

one year from now. some of the questions are, where do you live? How do you feel? What does a day look like for you? Those are all things that could be answered in those top five things. What does your financial situation look like emotional, and personal well-being? So these are just, I guess, and just prompts for you to write down what your ideal life looks like will look like one year from now.

So exercise vision mapping. So what does this even look like? What is vision mapping, right? priorities and non-negotiables. This is super important because, again, you're not going to get everything you want in divorce. And not even through the agreement, but just what's important to you in your life and what are non-negotiables. For me, outside of the assets that were being divided in my

marriage, know, exercise is a non-negotiable to me, meaning I have to have that in my life. And so in creating priorities, like self-care was really important and how I take care of my body and how I take care of my mind, like that's a non-negotiable. So identify what you will no longer accept in your life moving forward, because sometimes

You have things that were not happening when you were married, that you wish were happening because it was so meaningful to you, but you weren't getting them, right? So identify what you're no longer going to accept in your own life moving forward. OK, what are those non-negotiables? What are those priorities that you really, really believe to be important to you? And so then I want you to write what we call a statement of intention.

write one sentence affirmation for what you are working towards. For example, I am creating a life filled with peace, purpose, and joy, and I am fully in control of my happiness.

Did you notice how I'm not pointing my unhappiness and blame on somebody else like somebody else is making me unhappy? The only person who's making you unhappy is you. The things that are happening outside of you, things that you can't control, the circumstances, the facts of your life, it's the way you think about them that are making you feel unhappy.

So you are in control of that happiness because you are in control of the way you think about things and how you position them in your own mind. So that is, if you don't get to it right now, it is something that you are going to need to finish up tonight. Focused awareness and noticing old patterns and mental blocks.

Sometimes it is just the awareness of where our mindset is.

And so the manifestation and what we want for our desired outcome has to do with that, has to do with being able to shift from a scarcity mindset to an abundance mindset. That's a manifestation of a desired outcome you want in your life. You want to be able to move from a pessimistic narrative to an optimistic narrative. You want to be able to deal with it.

high conflict situations in a way that doesn't seem combative, that doesn't seem like you're pushing out threats and attacks. Those are all things that you can manifest in your outcome, in the way you want to live your life moving forward. Again, it doesn't have to be where I'm living and who I'm with.

how much time I'm spending with my kids, it really also can be an emotional piece of it that you're pushing out there because if you have that piece in your manifestation, that's what's going to turn around all the rest of things in your life. Recognize and repeat, recognize. So they've got three different portions of their awareness. The second part is recognized. So repeating some of the same patterns. If you do that, you are going to get the same results.

So if you're somebody that seems to, maybe this isn't your first divorce, maybe it's your second divorce, and sometimes you have to be reflective, right? You have to recognize the patterns of behavior that you're showing up with. Because again, if you don't break some of those patterns, you're going to get the same results. If you haven't done any work on attachment,

It's definitely something that you should consider doing, understanding if you're an anxiously attached person or if you are an avoidant or if you are securely attached, because it really affects the way that you can develop relationships with people and not just a spouse or girlfriend or boyfriend, but how you connect with your kids, how you connect with your extended family, how you connect with your friends.

So that attachment theory is really important because it gives you some insight into how you are relating to others in your life and what are your tendencies, what are your patterns of behavior. And once you do recognize that, there are some shifts that you can do. We do have a bunch of things on the attachment theory in our support group membership.

which is like a vault of library of all sorts of resources that are gonna be available to you if you are also interested in weekly support groups as well as getting more education. The last piece of it is observed. So observing your emotional triggers and we all have them, we all have them. And especially in this divorce time period, if you're in a relationship that was really struggling,

We all have these emotional triggers. We know what sets us off. We know what creates limiting beliefs, right? And these habitual responses are what really could be holding us back. You know, if you're super, super triggered about certain things, again, those are your thoughts. The triggers are something that happens or something that somebody says, and those are the facts. But you're being triggered by it is your belief around the interpretation of what

that person just said or what just was done, right? It is all about the way that you are telling yourself stories about that, That's gonna basically get you in this stuck position as these habitual behaviors are gonna continue. You're gonna continue to react and behave in those ways if you don't have some sort of recognition of what they are.

some observation of what they are so you can begin to retrain your mind on how to not be so reactive to them and how to re-script those very specific things that seem to be triggering for you.

So why does it matter? It really matters because it really will help you break free from your self-sabotaging habits. These things that you continue to be reactive about, the only person you're really hurting is yourself because it's self-sabotage when you don't have recognition and understanding of what these things are because you have the ability to make some changes in the way you think.

it also allows you to understand the fears or doubts that you're having that continue to block your progress. Okay. Understanding some of those fears, understanding the self-doubt or just the inability, the lack of courage, to, move yourself forward, to do things on your own. You can do things on your own. You just have to believe that you can't. Right.

We all have fears because of all emotions, guess what? They originate from fears. I have a four-part series on fear in our membership. And it's really important that you learn how to overcome these fears. And like I said yesterday, it's about riding those waves. If you look at fear as waves, it's about learning how to ride those waves. It's learning how to drop in.

and being able to move through that fear versus just sitting there and waiting for all those waves to crash down on top of you. So really good to do the work on fear because fear creates all of your emotions. And we go much more in-depth on that in our fear series. Supports in rewiring your thought process. Again, it does. We all have to rewire. And this is

whole five days has it been about rewiring and how you're going to do it. Because we want you to make empowered decisions. We want you to get into that legal negotiation room, and feel empowered with the decisions that you're making. Again, the only bad decision is one that you don't make. So you've got to be able to go in there and make decisions.

Okay, we're going to do an audit. And this is something that you have to do over the next three days. So it's something that I want you to either... I use the note function on my phone. Some people have just a little pad or a journal around, but I want you to be recognizing during your day, all the negative thoughts, all the self-doubt, and all the limiting beliefs that you notice.

and I want you to write them down. so when they pop into your head, I want you to write them down. And it's really kind of what we call a thought download, a data dump of these thoughts that are ruminating in your mind. It's very helpful to get all these things down on paper. And then at the end of the day, when you're winding down, I want you to reflect back, whether it be in the notes section of your phone or in this book. And I want you

to look at these and ask yourself, is this a fact, or is this an old thought pattern that is just resurfacing? Okay. Because if it is a fact, okay, I just want you to cross it out. And if it is a thought pattern, it is a thought that continues to ruminate in your mind day after day. And maybe it's written down a little differently.

but you're recognizing it as a very common thought pattern, I want you to let it be, okay? No circles, no cross-outs. I just want you to recognize the thoughts that you are really stuck on. Again, this is how we start to recognize these thought patterns. There are things that continue to come up for us.

So then we want to break the cycle. mean, part of what we want to do here is that we want to make sure that these patterns of behavior are not what's going to hold us back in the future. So an example of this is I'm not good at managing finances, or I have had a hard time saying no to things, even if I don't want to do them, since I don't want people to make me upset.

people to believe that I'm upset with them, or I don't want people to believe that they're upset with me. People pleasers want to continue to do things even though they don't want to do them because they don't want anybody to be mad at them. In our five-step game plan, we talk a lot about unconditional love. And so we talk about what that even means. So we go into a lot of this people-pleasing mentality.

and how we need to shift it to understanding what unconditional love means. So then I want you to rewrite this into more of an empowerment statement. OK, so we're breaking the cycle here. This is what the top one is being rescripted. And it says I am learning to manage my finances confidently. And I trust myself to set boundaries around things that I don't want to continue to do, which does not.

re-make it, foo- just, bleh. so I'm to read it one more time. Tongue twister. I am learning to manage my finances confidently and I trust myself to set boundaries around things that I do not want to continue to do, which does not, mean that I do not love the people in my life any less. Just because you don't want to do something that you've always done doesn't mean you love somebody any less.

You're just setting a boundary and that is okay. It is okay. As long as you remind them how much you love them, but you're still not going to do that for them. I know it's really hard. have this relationship with my son and I have had too many times be like, you know what? I'm not going to do your laundry today. You're old enough to do your laundry. It doesn't mean that I love you any less. It's just time.

And so, you do get some pushback and I'm sure there's always people who are going to try to manipulate the situation. And sometimes you'll cave and sometimes you won't. But again, it's really just making sure that you're drawing some awareness to the patterns of behavior that you know you have and beginning to set some boundaries and reminders that you don't love that person any less.

And if it's your soon-to-be X and you're not going to tell them that you don't that you don't love them any less, you can still set the boundary and then just say something nice. It's okay to still say something nice. And we do a lot of communication training in our five-step game plan that talks a lot about how to communicate with high-conflict individuals. So again, we all need to learn that skill. I do have a free PDF download about

the six communication techniques on how to get what you want in divorce. There is a free webinar that is on our website about that. So you can definitely go to our homepage and go to the webinar page and there's a free download for that.

If you believe I can't set boundaries, then I want you to practice saying no to one small thing today. If you believe that you don't have the capacity or capability to manage your finances, I want you to do one small thing today. I want you to sign up for online banking. And you're going to get yourself an account and that's the only thing you're going to do. Just get the account today. So get one thing done.

The one small thing done that counteracts whatever you believe is your limiting belief about yourself. One of those small things to allow for you to see that it just takes one small action every day to challenge your limiting beliefs so you can set some intentions on how you're gonna move your life forward.

So let's move into deliberate action. right. Aligning your choices with your future. So manifestation meets intentional action. So what does that even mean? So clarity completed? Well, you know what you want and you have an awareness of what's holding you back. But now it's time to start making small, deliberate changes. Okay. So you can move your goal forward. Again, we just talked about

Tomorrow, you're gonna do two small things that are gonna be focused on your limited beliefs so you can take action to make sure that you know. And again, these small deliberate changes are gonna continue to move you towards that goal.

So without taking action, manifestation, is just a dream, right? You can create a vision board, and you can dream really big, but if you don't take action, nothing's going to happen. It takes real aligned effort to make it real. And so the only person that can make it real is you. So every small choice you make will build momentum. It will build confidence in your ability to shape your future.

So action really does create the evidence to show that you are capable, that it can reinforce your self-belief that you can get through this and you do have resilience and you can make changes in your life. And it's not going to help happen overnight, but it will happen if you take small steps every day.

I want you to take a bold step forward towards your future self. If you are still in this legal divorce process, I want you to choose one tangible action that aligns with your vision.

You haven't made any phone calls. This has been your first step. You're just gathering information. No legal professionals have been contacted. If you are in the middle of the process, meaning that you've hired an attorney or maybe you have a mediator or maybe you're working with a certified divorce financial analyst,

If you are, then go ahead and put the fact in that you're in the process. Okay. And then in the chat, if you have finished your agreement and you're still feeling lousy and that's why you're here because you just want the feeling of lousiness to end and you're ready to move your life forward, just put in post. Okay.

Would love to hear where everybody is. So if you're still in this legal process or if you're just beginning your journey, I want you to take some tangible actions. Schedule some consultations with attorneys,

Some mediators will work across state lines. They can't write agreements in all states, but they can mediate in all states. For the most part, you just would end up with what they call a memorandum of understanding. And then you bring that to a lawyer to draft the agreement.

So lawyers do have to have licenses in the states. And then you can work with certified divorce financial analysts. You can work with real estate people who specifically work with people who are getting divorced. There are certified divorce mortgage lenders that also work with mortgages specifically for people who are getting divorced. Since there's complexity with income, they're very accustomed to doing that.

So I want you to schedule some consultations or go ahead and go to vesteddivorce.com and they will help you get to some great professionals and get things scheduled. I want you to interview potential coaches. I want you to believe or therapists. I want you to believe that coaching is valuable. This is valuable work. Working with you one-on-one is valuable work.

If you're really struggling with your past in terms of things that happened to you as you were growing up or, you know, just things that you believe are baggage that may have affected, you know, you and your relationships. That is the work of a therapist. Divorce coaches really do work on your mindset during the divorce process. We work on getting you moving your life forward.

instead of backward and making sure that your head is in the right place throughout your entire negotiation. again, lots and lots of pre-work. I always say it's important to put some of these interviews down. These are small steps towards your future self. Again, your divorce is not going to complete itself on its own. You are going to need to take action. The last thing that you can do

Again, just choose one of these. You don't have to do all three. Organize your financial documents. Begin to gather all of your account numbers. Make sure you know where your health insurance is, your life insurance. Those are all things that you need to be gathering. All of your 401Ks, your IRAs, any investment accounts, any property that you own, you're going to need to get

appraisals on those homes that you own, you are going to need to know the Kelly Blue Book value of your cars, what kind of equity you have in them, and how much you still owe on them. These are all of the things you're going to need to do. In the last section of our five-step game plan, we have a get prep section, which goes into much more detail on how you get ready for your legal divorce.

But I just want for this week we are doing small steps here. I want you to take one small step. Do one little thing here. Contact vestadivorce.com Go ahead and set up a free consultation with me if you want. That can be your small step. Organize some of your financial documents. Again, just get something in place so you feel like you've moved yourself forward.

if you have already finalized your divorce and you're at the end, then what I want you to do is I want you to start exploring new social opportunities. I want you to get on to meet up in your area and start scrolling through all the amazing things that you could be doing, and all the new people you could be engaging with.

There are so many amazing events. Personally, I joined a trail running club in two different locations in my area. I met a ton of people I never would have met otherwise. So figure out what those interests are. There literally is something for everyone on Meetup from pottery to hiking to sipping wine to reading short stories to

single social clubs, there are so many things on meetup for you to do. I want you to try a new hobby or a sport that you have been apprehensive about. But just get yourself out there, go pick up a pickleball rocket, you know, go get a lesson or participate in open play. There are so many depending on where you live. You know, there's open play for newbies, or decide you want to start

knitting or decide to start walking and ask a couple of friends if you know what let's do on Tuesday and Thursday mornings let's start to walk. Just try to do something new okay out of your comfort zone and then for those of you who are out of your divorce and you're on the end, step back into the dating world and if you're fearful about that go ahead and set up a coaching call with me I am happy to

get you through those initial stages of dating. Dating can be really fun if you go in it with the right mindset. It really can be. If you're shopping for love, yeah, most likely it's not gonna be successful for you, but there are so many ways to approach dating in such a fresh way that it can be fun. Go ahead and set up that free consultation with me and I can walk you through those stages as well.

and then I want you to commit to a daily micro action. Okay. One small thing you can do daily is to move towards your vision. You know, if having peace in your life is one of those things that you put in your, in your statement, then one small thing you could be doing daily is a 15-minute meditation. That's the kind of small daily thing that I want you to commit to. If again, having peace in your life.

is part of that commitment, that statement that you wrote, then doing daily gratitudes, doing thought downloads, those are all things that you can commit to daily that will move you towards that bigger vision. So example, a goal is emotional healing, committing to journaling for five minutes a day, or meditation, or walking in the woods.

So these are the small things I really want you to be able to write down and commit to yourself. And I want you to put it where you see it. So you have a lot of things in front of you in terms of what you want to be able to see. You've got your personal self, your commitment to self-statement. You've got your vision statement. Now we've got our commitment to doing that small daily action every day, lots of things to consider. And then I want you to

write down one action that you're going to take within two hours of closing of this lesson. And I want you to share it with a friend. I want you to share it with a coach. You can email it to me. You guys all have my email at this point. or again, if you want to join our support groups on Wednesdays, we do have support groups at this time every Wednesday. And I'd love for you all to consider joining us.

and we can all share the work that we're doing in that support group. But it's important to be able to have somebody you can have accountability with.

So some final thoughts here. I just want everybody to remember that manifesting your post-divorce life really is not about hoping for the best. You're not hoping for the best. It's about just getting some clear understanding, shifting your mindset, and taking those intentional steps forward.

Today, we've taken some steps forward. We've got some clarity around your future. You've definitely written some things down. You've prioritized. You've got the non-negotiable set. You begin to recognize those limiting beliefs. You begin to understand those patterns of behavior, the triggers in your life. And once you recognize them, you can begin to step forward to take action against them, to make those changes so they don't bump like

bring you back down again. That really gets you stepping into empowerment. And then I want you to take deliberate action to shape the life you desire. And that's really, really important. And it's time to commit to thriving and not surviving. What do y'all think about that? We have spent five days. We don't want these five days to be anything other than empowered.

I want to empower you. want you to feel like you've got to do this work. And I know there's a lot of work here and I don't expect you to get it all done this weekend. But map out a plan for yourself, map out when you are going to do the work. We have five days of work. But some of it's going to take 30 minutes. Some is going to take an hour, but I want you to commit to yourself when you are going to finish this work. Okay. Because the sooner you get it done,

the better you're going to feel. So the only person you're hurting is yourself. If you're here for five days and you don't go do the work, then the only person you're hurting is yourself. All right. So

This problem that we came in with today without clarity about what you want in your life and how you want to feel the experiences you need to have. You can't reach for that outcome if you don't know what that outcome looks like. It's like training at football camp and saying, I just want to run the 50. Well, what do you want to run the 50 in? You know, I mean, do you want to run it in 4.6 seconds or do you just want to run it?

Because if you're out there training and you don't know what you're training for, you don't know how hard to train. So put some commitments to yourself on paper. The solution, get that clarity, and envision what that life is going to look like.

Each day you are going to check in, you're going to look at those limiting beliefs because now you've taken notes on those ruminating thoughts. You're going to start crossing off all those facts, right? And just leave the thoughts that are just sitting there that you continue to ruminate. You're going to recognize that you have some patterns of behavior and you're going to begin to consciously flip the script on yourself, consciously begin to find different ways to think differently.

And then you're going to start your daily actions. You're going to look at your manifestation. You're going to look at that vision and you're going to create a daily action that's going to drive you closer to that vision.

So we just completed our five-day challenge.

It's not about communicating to me, but it's just releasing that out into the world. So in conclusion, we've made it through the five days. You spent the last five days growing and learning. You don't have to stay stuck in this survival mode. That's what this was all about. You do not need to stay stuck. And so let's be honest, there's a lot ahead, right? Right now, you might still feel overwhelmed. You might...

be looking at decision by decision and still feel like they are very emotional decisions that you feel like you need to make. You might be super drained from doing everything on your own, or maybe you're just unsure of what those next steps need to be. And that's okay. I just want you to take a deep breath because now you have some tools in your toolbox, okay, to begin to chip away at the overwhelming, begin to chip away at feeling like you're the

You've been having to do everything on your own and you don't know where to turn at this point. You now have some tools in your toolbox. At least you can get started on yourself. So I want everybody now to close your eyes and I want you to imagine feeling supported by people who truly understand. I want you to close your eyes and feel confident in your decisions about your future.

I want you to close your eyes and I want you to feel lighter. I want you to feel lighter because you're not carrying this weight alone. Believe that relief is possible, peace is possible, and your new beginning is absolutely possible.

So I want to just open this up to everybody today, as well as those who are streaming on Facebook. I have an amazing opportunity for you to get a free consult from me. I am here for all of you. I appreciate the fact that you have shown up for this course, but showed up for yourself.

And so if you scan this QR code here, it'll bring you to an application page where you can apply for a free, consult with me. The only time I don't do consults, right off the bat is when you are in a physically abusive relationship. If you are, please contact the people at vesteddivorce.com because they can put you in touch.

with where you need to go for safety. I am not your first step if you are physically abused in your relationship. But for all of you who are not in a physically abusive relationship, even if you are in an emotionally abusive relationship, you still can consult with me as your first step. And from there, we can develop a plan for you, meaning that, you know, does support group work makes sense for you to do more

coursework makes sense for you do one to one coaching while you're going through the legal process because you really need help with high-conflict communication does that make sense for you so I will be there to listen to your story to help guide you in terms of how you can have a more amicable divorce resolution you can save yourself a lot of money and you can save not only yourself but your children

from long-lasting emotional trauma. You can, okay? You just have to do the work and we can help you get there. So these are a couple of the ways like I said, we'll go over on the consult. I'm gonna throw that up there. If anybody wants to see more about how you work with a coach, you can scan that. goes right to kind of what we do here at Better Than Bitter. And if you do go ahead and

schedule a consult. And if you do end up wanting to work with us on a support group program, we are offering anybody who showed up or joined us through VIP, we are offering a buy a month, get a month free for all of you who are on the call today. So we're very excited.

I really do hope that at least you all decide to move into our support group because just showing up shows that you do want the support, that you're looking for guidance, and that you're willing to do the work. And that's really what support group is all about.

Congratulations on making it all the way through. Now you got to get back there and do the work, but I really believe in all of you you're going to do great things.

Tania Leichliter (: 41:28

Thanks for tuning in to Better Than Bitter, navigating an amicable divorce. Whether you are at the beginning of your divorce journey, midway through, or even done, we want the stories from our guests to give you hope that an amicable resolution is possible. If you'd like to dive deeper into today's episode, check out our show notes for a full transcript, reflections, and links to learn more about Better Than Bitter's coaching courses,

and how to connect with our fabulous guests. If you're ready for more support, you can head over to betterthanbitter.coach. Daily, you'll find details and additional information on our five-step game plan multimedia course, our one-to-one Zoom coaching, group coaching, monthly memberships, events and retreats, and a whole lot more. Plus, we've got a ton of free resources, like our monthly newsletter,

our private Facebook group, Instagram channel, and a library of articles and free webinars to help you along the way. When you go to our website, you'll be able to schedule a free 45-minute breakthrough call. Remember, we're here to help you reach an amicable resolution. Find your courage and believe in your brighter future because you know what? It is possible.

At Better Than Bitter, we measure success by what we give and not by what we get. So let's change the divorce dialogue together. It's time to be better than bitter.